spiritual insecurity
"Now anxiety is the mark of spiritual insecurity. It is the fruit of unanswered questions. But questions cannot go unanswered unless they first be asked. And there is a far worse anxiety, a far worse insecurity, which comes from being afraid to ask the right questions. One of the moral diseases we communicate to one another in society comes from huddling together in the pale light of an insufficient answer to a question we are afraid to ask."
--Thomas Merton No Man Is An Island
I love the line "...huddling together in the pale light of an insufficient answer...." So often we find comfort and security in those who seem to have all of the answers or at least seem confident in a weak answer. We recognize that the answer they gave us was pretty lame, but we're afraid to press the question deeper. Afraid of what the real answer is and afraid of looking bad in front of others. We feel that maybe it is insecure or spiritually immature of us to ask questions everyone else seems fine avoiding. I agree with Merton, the insecurity seems to rest on those who are afraid to ask. I think it takes divine strength and confidence to ask a question that may open a door to a world you had not prepared to enter. Asking certain questions may pull back the curtain to reveal something unexpected or unwanted. Once something is revealed, one cannot go back. Church folk prefer to "stay the course" and stick with what they know, especially those who are comfortable in this world. But perhaps we are called to explore and wander a bit. To "pack a suitcase for a place that none of us has been" (thanks Bono). "You have not because you ask not...." (James 4.2-3). Jesus said it this way, '...ask and it will be given, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened unto you..." (Matt 7.7-11). We mostly interpret this to mean things and opportunities for "success" (expensive things if you watch TBN). But what if Jesus meant answers and ultimately spiritual confidence? I know having answers doesn't sound as cool as having a new car. But perhaps a deeper relationship and clearer understanding of God's Kingdom is to be preferred in the long run. We don't have the answers because we are afraid to ask the questions. We would prefer to stay in the pale light huddled with others who fear the truth. I think we may find something far better than what we know if we could just muster the courage to ask.
I love the line "...huddling together in the pale light of an insufficient answer...." So often we find comfort and security in those who seem to have all of the answers or at least seem confident in a weak answer. We recognize that the answer they gave us was pretty lame, but we're afraid to press the question deeper. Afraid of what the real answer is and afraid of looking bad in front of others. We feel that maybe it is insecure or spiritually immature of us to ask questions everyone else seems fine avoiding. I agree with Merton, the insecurity seems to rest on those who are afraid to ask. I think it takes divine strength and confidence to ask a question that may open a door to a world you had not prepared to enter. Asking certain questions may pull back the curtain to reveal something unexpected or unwanted. Once something is revealed, one cannot go back. Church folk prefer to "stay the course" and stick with what they know, especially those who are comfortable in this world. But perhaps we are called to explore and wander a bit. To "pack a suitcase for a place that none of us has been" (thanks Bono). "You have not because you ask not...." (James 4.2-3). Jesus said it this way, '...ask and it will be given, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened unto you..." (Matt 7.7-11). We mostly interpret this to mean things and opportunities for "success" (expensive things if you watch TBN). But what if Jesus meant answers and ultimately spiritual confidence? I know having answers doesn't sound as cool as having a new car. But perhaps a deeper relationship and clearer understanding of God's Kingdom is to be preferred in the long run. We don't have the answers because we are afraid to ask the questions. We would prefer to stay in the pale light huddled with others who fear the truth. I think we may find something far better than what we know if we could just muster the courage to ask.
